Abyss

Getting over a love that never was

is quite a daunting task

We had been together for a couple of years

We had shared everything under the sun

We got to know quite a bit

better than anyone ever did

In the middle of it all

I started sinking deeper into her

I fell for her and never realized

I realized it when I started to notice

the burning sensation that over powers me

when somebody looks at her

The same overwhelms me completely

when she talks of some guy

It was a struggle to hide that from her

For I never saw any such signs from her end

More than these brief stints of possessiveness

I started missing her when she was not around

I started caring about her when she was not well

I started feeling her pain as mine when she was hurt

All these came up to such a level

where it had never reached before

Even in all this she never realized

how much I love her

May be it was me or

The way I said it

It never brought the desired result

when I finally said it

As time went on

I went on loving her more and more

without her realizing that fact

Even me not realizing the fact

that I am plunging deeper and deeper

Into the Abyss of love

Now I find myself in a place where

getting out of this Abyss called love,

that never was

Is the most difficult thing I ever faced…

The Role

The story has been written

The characters have been chosen

The writer up there was considerate enough

to fix up a role for me too

He gave me the script when I came down

I was playing the role that was given

The fellow players also played along

The play was going all fine and well

or at least that’s what I believed

Then at a point I felt

the lines that they where saying

was not at all there in my script

I turn the pages back and forth

only to realize that its not there

It felt like the whole play itself is different

So now I ask myself

Was I not part of this play?

or did I loose the script meant for this

Now I am wondering about a lot of things

Am I fit for this stage at all?

Did I enter at the wrong time?

or at the wrong place ?

Now I look around to make sense of it all

And to play along till

I get to the right place

Where I was supposed to enter

So I could play the rest of the role

And make it a meaningful character

In this elaborate play

That’s set on such a grand stage...

Light

He loved her like the night loved its moon

He missed her when she was away

like the night missing his moon

He told her what he felt

She told him what she felt

They never got together till the end

For she was stuck somewhere

He tried to help

He tired to pull her out

She just wouldn’t come out

He still had his faith

that he could get her out

He still loved her so much

She just could not see that

For she was in the dark

He wanted to be the light

that shows her the way out

of the mess she was in

She just couldn’t see

the light out there bright

or she just didn’t want to

look out at that

For the light was the truth

that she dreaded to see

He is still by her side

still holding the light

But only god knows if she is

gonna follow the light

And now he is wondering

if the lights are fading

He still wants it burning

but can’t stop its fading

For the air that it needs

to burn all that bright

ain’t just looking

or cooperating

For him to burn

As bright as he can…

s’Word’

We choose to communicate

We choose a means

We choose the most powerful

We choose the words

We mail, we text

So as to express

You feel your heart

You spell it out

You spell it wrong

They get it wrong

They feel it wrong

They feel it’s wrong

They interpret

Again and again

From left to right

And back and forth

They get the same

Because you ‘misspelled’ the same

They feel the pain

Of your mistake

They blame the same

On you and them

You come to know

Of the same

By the time

You get to know its

Late in the day

To change a thing

To express is right

You express it wrong

Then nothing is left

So choose wisely

Before you write

Or else you might

Cut yourself

With the mighty s’Word’

And for the ones who read

Take the pain of reading again

Or else it will pain again and again…

How much…

She was trying to say something

Since a couple of days

She finally brought it out

In her own ways

I for one couldn’t understand

What it meant or how much it means

So I passed it by in my busy routine

Not realizing how much it hurt

Then she decided to let me know

How much she was hurt,

She started it but left it unsaid

Now I wait for her to come back

And finish what she had left unsaid

For I am not god

To read what’s in her mind

It took me couple of days to realize

How much it might have hurt

Now my apologies wouldn’t stand

In front of the grieve she had to face…

For Her

When I walked through the fog

She was the light

When I walked all alone

Hers was the hand I held

When I had to talk

She was there to listen

When I cried

She was the one to console

When I wanted to laugh

She was there to make me

Now out in the dark all alone

I could not find her arm

I can’t hear her voice

I can’t feel her presence

I can’t see her glittering smile

Where did I loose her I ask?

To myself for an answer

But I find none,

Seems I will have to keep looking for her

May be she will walk up to help an old friend…

Hold On

When you try to ignore you can’t

For they are too close to you

When you try to forget you can’t

For they live in your heart

When you try to detach you can’t

For you can’t cutoff part of your heart

When you try to erase you can’t

For it will be like erasing half of your good memories

When you try to get over you can’t

For there are some people whom you can never get over

And when you try to stay and hold on you still can’t

For some unknown reason you just can’t seem to hold on

Still you try to hold on

For if you let go you might end up loosing a gem…