Beyond

Tonight I did it

I crossed the line beyond,

the point of no return

I went where my wild mind took me

Without thinking how much it will,

hurt or pain for some one else

Some one close, so close that

I held on so strongly

For I didn’t want to loose

Some one this precious

I have failed that attempt

Of mine to hold on

Don’t know what’s next

Today one more claim fell off

And shattered

It seems I was not as good

In understanding someone

As I used to claim

And for eternity I might not know

How deep the cut was

That I had caused

For my mindless act

I might have to pay a heavy price

I dread that, one thing that I dreaded most

For I have to take it

What ever the outcome might be

For it was me who crossed over

Beyond the point of no return…

Unlucky In love

He was a boy who was unlucky in love

The first girl he loved was pretty and nice

But she turned out to be his best friends squeeze

The next girl he loved was talented and wise

But it seems that she was never in love at all

The third girl he liked was an introvert and shy

But the whole thing fell off like a rock,

Before it could even take off

The last girl he liked was an extrovert and lively

But he later taught himself that it was not love,

For it was something more than a friendship

But not the love he seek

This is the story of a boy who was unlucky in love

And still it seems is searching for his true love…

After the Rain...

This is my personal favourite, for a simple reason...Its not what meets the naked eye, the drops are actually on the top of the leaf and the shot is taken from below...so I call it the Visual Illusion...

Alone...

I was born alone and fine

Into a world that back then was fine

As I grew I met many folks

Of whom some became my friends

When I was young I was all alone

If not for my summer time friend

During schools I met many in my way

But hardly any one was close to me

In my teenage I made my closest ones

But the journey of life took them far away

During college I made some friends

Hardly a handful was worth keeping there

After I left I still was close, but

Again the journey of life took them away

Still I try to keep in touch

Only to realize one day even they will go

For in this world you come, travel and leave alone…

Mystery

The world doesn’t know me

For I am a mystery

The people around me doesn’t know me

For they never asked me

The people who are not around me doesn’t know me

For them I am a stranger

I myself do not know me

For that is the ultimate question

The one soul who knows me

Is someone am yet to meet

To live and to die as a mystery

For that is my biggest dream…

Purpose of Life

It was a beautiful evening. It was very pleasant for a summer evening, thanks to the showers in the afternoon. There wasn’t much to do; it was like any of my other vacations to Kerala. I was just cooling my heels off.

That when I noticed a light green thing moving on my dining table. On a closer look I noticed that it is a small spider. It was very beautiful creature. Very different from the spiders that you get to see in Kerala. I quickly grabbed the mobile to capture it. He was giving a hard time; he was running here and there so it was quite difficult to get a nice shot. All the possible angles where explored to get that perfect shot. And I just kept clicking. What came next was something that I really didn’t expect.

I leaned down in front of him to get a nice close up shot. I guess it was his curiosity to explore or his discomfort that made him jump on to the mobile. I was surprised and scared at the same time and I dropped the cam. The moment I dropped it I knew it was a mistake; I grabbed the cam as quickly as I can to see if the little fellow is alright. It was a sad scene. The impact had crushed him. I was cursing myself for dropping the cam. Even though it was a reflex action I just couldn’t forgive myself.

All evening I spent thinking about my mistake, how even ones reflex action could cause such damage. I never wanted it to happen but at the end of it, it was my own hands that brought the tragedy. I felt that I should never publish that photograph as a mark of my respect to that creature.

On an after thought I felt - If this photograph is not published a life would have been lost for nothing. Every life has a purpose may be the purpose of that spiders life was to teach an important lesson to me and to anyone who is willing to listen.

How much does a person’s action conscious or otherwise affect others? That thought just got stuck in my mind. This was just one creature that lost his life to an unconscious act of a human being. There are so many creatures that loose their life or habitat due to our never ending greed and thoughtless actions. A lot many of us or rather all of us contribute directly or indirectly to aggravate that problem. It’s just that we don’t have time to think about them or we choose not to. We have our own silly lives to live. In that never ending race to satisfy our greed we forget that, this planet and the creatures in it will happily survive without us, but it would be quite difficult for us to survive if some of those creatures are not there.

That event changed me, I want to do something to make a difference, I just have to find out how. All of us can do this; you just have to find out how you can. From each according to his ability and potential, only then will there be a change. We are a part of the problem so we have to be a part of the solution.

The irony is that This is the only good image that I managed to get...

Exploration...

Compared to other days I had an early start for the day. It was the second day of a long weekend. My sister and her family had come by for the weekend. So I decided to spend some time with them since they where planning to leave in the evening. I was at my place for most of the day, so I got out in the late after noon. I helped my sister and family catch a taxi to there place and went to my aunt’s place. It was a beautiful evening, like many other beautiful ones that I had wasted without doing literally anything.

I am a typical human being the kind who always craves for company of his social mates. One of thing that I hated the most to do was stepping out for no reason and that too all alone. I had always believed it to be a dreadful idea. For some of you out there it’s a normal and simple thing to do. But for me it is one of the most difficult things. And this was something that I have always wanted to change about myself. Keeping that in the back of my mind I spent some time at my aunt’s place and decided to step out. Thinking that it was too late to go some where I decided to take a stroll around at my neighborhood only.

I had a place in my mind where I felt I should be on such a beautiful evening. I walked by the side of the road. I went farther and farther, my instinct was asking me to go for it. But my brains where saying not to. Caught in two minds I decided to walk some more. I reached the Bus Stop, and that very moment I saw a bus at a distance. There where no second thoughts, I boarded the bus. Through out the journey I was not sure if I will do this or rather if I should be doing this. But watching the sun in the horizon convinced me. I have to do this. I had to make two changes to get to the place that I had in my mind. I made the first change quickly. But luck and city traffic had other plans. I got stuck. I had to reach there before sun set since that was what inspired me to get on this journey, but now it’s clear that I won’t be able to. I was cursing myself for taking up this adventure. Committed to the cause I decided to push on. I had no idea what was in store for me there now. I changed again and slowly crawled through the city traffic. It was almost dark and I had no idea as to what I was going to do there in the dead of night.

I stepped out at the destination. Here I am at Bandra Bandstand; approx. half an hour late. And all that I could hear was the waves crashing on to the rocks on the sea shore. When I looked at the sea I could see lights slowly moving across the horizon. Towards the right I could see the lights of another part of the city. I grabbed a spot along side some youngsters sitting on the sea facing wall. And there was this couple sitting to my left. And in front of me in the blanket of darkness I could see blurred images making the most out of the gift of the night. I tried to give them their space by looking somewhere else. But it was a hard task, you where bound to lay your eyes on some or the other because there where so many of them. Once I realized that they where least concerned about the world and the people in it I grew more comfortable and tried to take in every ounce of the fresh air around. That’s when I noticed the jerks sitting on my side were just some desperados having fun by invading into someone else’s privacy. I felt sick to the core, why is this country and the people in it so intolerant and jealous about someone else’s happy moments. I knew I didn’t belong there. I picked myself up and decided to seek shelter on some lonely rock perched close to the water.

I carefully made my way through the hard terrain. To my surprise I found that there were so many people sitting there in the darkness. I tried not disturb them and was seriously reconsidering my decision, partly because of my self assumed sense of embarrassment of being a single jerk in the eyes of those couples. To my relief I found that there where families hanging out there. I made my way through and found a comfortable spot on a rock perched on the waters edge. I was feeling something that I have never felt before. I have never in my entire life enjoyed being lonely, and here I am sitting on a rock all alone in complete darkness, and enjoying every second of it. I was feeling as if I have learned to walk; only glitch being I don’t remember exactly how it felt, because I was not old enough to have too many feelings back then. But still it was some thing un-explainable by mere written words, indescribable by mere pictures. You have to feel it to understand it, the extraordinary feeling of Joy that comes up on you when you explore.

After spending some time there I decided its time to move on. It was a cold February night and I was feeling the chill in the air. So I made my way to the café nearby. There I found this table with only one chair on its side, I felt as if it was waiting for me all evening. I quickly grabbed my spot, and started enjoying the slight breeze that was hitting my face. I ordered a hot coffee and waited for the coffee to come. The place was packed to capacity and people where waiting to have a seat. Since I had a huge mug of coffee with me and loads of time I started observing people around me. I saw this lady working on her laptop sting alone which made me realize that I am not the only one with wacky ideas. Then I found this lady from Japan and her Indian friend discussing music. Then there was this bunch of foreigners. Who where waiting for a table to be empty. The place contained people from different parts of the world and different back grounds brought together by one cause; to have a coffee and have a nice conversation over that.

I observed many of them for some more time. You literally see life in front of you eyes. What people want in life, their expectations, their petty issues in life, their habits just to name a few. Everything right in front of you eyes. I noticed that people live with the slightest concern for the world around them. By then it was time to move on. I realized that I am pretty far from my place and I will have to get back. So I slowly picked up my self and made way through the small yet crowded roads to catch a ride. I was feeling a great sense of satisfaction, because today I learned to walk, to walk alone in my life and to enjoy that too. With this lesson in my heart I started my journey back. There was this great sense of elation in my heart and a belief that this is one journey of exploration that changed has changed me…